I have a very hard time keeping my thoughts on positive things. Good things about myself. Peaceful things. You know, like walking through a field of sunflowers on a sunny day. Even when I do ( on some days), a cloud comes rumbling by ruining everything! Normally, the cloud takes the form of people in my past who has emotionally abused me in one form or another. I used to cry all the time and tell myself how right they must be. If things were the opposite, they wouldn’t treat me this way.
Well, you know Easter is Sunday. I’m a Christian, so naturally, my beliefs are centered around Christ. When Passion of the Christ came out, I found out how much Jesus had suffered for me to have happiness and peace in my life. I found out that I didn’t have to accept what a person had done or said about me. I could take those thoughts and cast them away from me! It’s similar to what my therapist is helping me to do. Easier said than done, right? Right. As I become a better steward of the word of God, I find that I am also taking those ugly thoughts and finding where they originated from with my therapist. I am healing and forgiving myself and others!
I went for my Psychiatry appointment today and discussed some of the feelings and thoughts that are trying to stick around. I told her what I was doing along with my therapy, and she said to continue on. Right now, I will stay on the medication combination along with therapy.
I know I have a way to go with changing my thoughts or stuck points, but with me writing them down and getting to the roots of them, I am feeling stronger and better daily. It is a process that I have started and will continue.
Until next time
Give yourself credit for the strides you are making.