It’s been awhile. Since the pandemic, my thoughts have been elsewhere. I can’t say that anxiety has not come knocking, because it has. I seem to have drifted back to one of my coping strategies. Purchasing books. I love to read and that’s not the problem. The problem is that I am not reading what is purchased!
The books feel like a security blanket of some sort. The more I buy, the worse I feel. Yes, I feel worse. I had spoken with my therapist previously when I was in therapy. He seemed to think that it was an o.k. phase. Sort of like the numerous pens I have been collecting for years! I laugh at and to myself. Is he serious?! He was. He told me these where 2 of the things that meant a great deal to me during my childhood. Because I didn’t have very many pretty pens, I became fascinated with being able to purchase the things I wanted. The books, just an added bonus.
Well, I am going to show a video, just not today. I do believe I am on my way to healing, the road is long right now since I kind of turned back.